Health & Fitness for Working Mums: The Full Series

Back in July 2019, I asked working mums in what areas they want to get some Lifestyle Lifts. The second most popular response from working mums (27%) was;

Health & Fitness

So, in August 2019, I published a five-week series on how working mums can get fitter and healthier. This article pulls together all five Lifestyle Lifts.

The Full Series of Lifestyle Lifts

1: The Six Minute Work Out

2: Family Workout

3: Four Hourly Feeds

4: Music Mantras

5: Uninvited Guest

The Six Minute Workout

This lifestyle lift is great for mums who find it difficult to commit to a regular fitness routine or don't currently have one. It is also fab for mums who already exercise and want to try something new. Roll in Zana Morris. I love her 6-minute HIIT video [High Intensity Interval Training]. It involves short bursts of exercise and you don't need to be super fit to get started. It's also a great time-efficient way to fit in to your daily routine. The beauty of it is, you can scale it up or down depending on your fitness level and involve the kids if you want to. Click here to see the video.

We can all find a spare 6 minutes in the day.

Family Workouts

This lifestyle lift carries on with the fitness theme and this time put your kids in the mix. Are you thinking that's impossible? Well here’s 4 short videos I have picked out for you. A workout with your kids, whatever their age, is totally possible.

Babies Help Mom and Dad with their Workouts / Baby Show How to Exercise Her Mum / The Busy Mom's Toddler Workout / Can’t Stop the Feeling Dance Workout - for older kids

Hope these videos give you inspiration to start or better your fitness routine. You and your older kids could even start designing one to do together.

Four Hourly Feeds

Nope, I'm not talking about breast - feeding. I do mean adult four hourly feeds. Sounds too good to be true, doesn't it - giving yourself permission to eat every four hours.

When we eat, we produce our ‘feel good’ chemicals – endorphins, oxytocins, serotonins, and dopamine - we are rewarded with ‘happy highs’. So, if eating makes us happy, why fight it? Let's eat every 4 hours and just be more savvy about what types of food we eat and how much.

Cut down portion sizes and eat more often - just stick to your overall recommended daily amounts. I've been doing this for years [mainly to avoid ‘Hangriness’] and it works. I'm ok to snack between meals because it's all part of the plan - treats included. You don't have to introduce big changes at once, just work up to it. You might first reduce your evening meal size, to fit in a mid-evening snack. Then reduce what you have for lunch to get a mid-afternoon snack and so on. The secret is to make sure your diet is balanced and healthy.

Here's 2 great articles from the experts to get you started;

A Balanced Diet for Women / Healthy Eating for Working Mums

Music Mantras

Have you thought any of these things lately?

“I can't do this” “I feel like I’m a terrible mum”, “Ughhhh, I think I'm losing my mind”

If the answer is yes, you are entertaining your ‘Uninvited Guest’– your negative inner voice.

Think about it. If you were throwing a party and an uninvited guest arrived and made you feel like crap, you’d throw them out, wouldn’t you? Well at least I hope you would.

Allowing negative thoughts to make you feel bad or berate you is not OK. Luckily, we all have the power to rid ourselves of negative thoughts. So free yourself from your ‘Uninvited Guest’ by tuning into Music Mantras. Listen to music you really love and sing along. Tune out negative thoughts and tune in to ‘good mood vibes’. Experience the dopamine release that makes you feel happy.

Here’s a masterpiece that is guaranteed to lift you up to regain your fighting spirit. Think you've got an even better one? Email kate@rootball.co.uk and let me know.

Uninvited Guest

What does your uninvited guest [critical inner voice] say to you?

When asked this question, many of us find it hard to put it into words. What we do know, is how it can make us feel… sometimes angry, anxious, confused, unworthy or even ugly.

None of us wants to feel like this. Yet, during times of stress, we give in to our uninvited guest, often believing the bad things we hear are true.

Feelings are not facts… We must not give our uninvited guests the power or influence to diminish our self-worth. Take positive action because your health and well-being depend on it.

Here’s how

Think of your uninvited guest, as another person - a saboteur. It is easier to tune out someone else than ourselves.

Look out for triggers. Notice the events and circumstances where negative thoughts and feelings arise. Note the exact words that spring to mind?

Without judgement or evaluation, respond to your uninvited guest with compassion - as you would to a loved one.

Here are some examples; UG: ‘I feel like a terrible mum’ YOU: ‘I always keep my kids safe and sound’

UG: ‘I can't handle this! ’ YOU: ‘Today, I’ll nail this!'

UG: ‘I feel like I'm losing my mind’ YOU: ‘Feelings are not facts… I’ll figure this out.'

Regular use of and belief in your ready-made responses means you will only start to entertain the guests you invite- the ones who truly enhance your life.

In what ways other do you rid yourself of your uninvited guest? Email kate@rootball.co.uk and let me know.

If you want more help to spur yourself into action, sign up here for a FREE copy of my Get Up and Go Lifestyle Lifts.

© Kate Halewood, ROOTBALL Coaching & Consultancy

More Free Time. The Full Series of Lifestyle Lifts for Working Mums

Back in July 2019, I asked Working Mums in what areas they want to get some Lifestyle Lifts. The most popular response from working mums (33%) was;

More Free Time - 'Me Time'

Schedule and Book 'Do Not Disturb' Time

Social Media Detox

Make Chores Childs' Play

Have Home Alone Hang Outs

Swap Wishes for Way Finders

So, in August 2019, I published a five-week series on how working mums can get more free time. This article pulls together all five Lifestyle Lifts.

Do Not Disturb Time

Do Not Disturb time makes way for you to do whatever you want without any interruptions. It's works just like if you were staying in a hotel. First decide on how much alone time you want, what you would like to do and how often.

Next find your sacred place for exclusive use. Then ask your loved ones to agree to give you uninterrupted time at your chosen location. Include the exact dates, times and the duration of alone time you want. Then work with your family to make it happen.

If you are a single mum, tap into your friends and working mum community and ask them for help to give you DND time. Good friends are always willing to help their pals thrive. Try to make your DND time at least an hour so you can really benefit and get stuck into something you love doing. Pre-plan your DND time and what you are going to do. This way you can jump right in and you will have something tangible to really look forward to.

Social Media Detox

Think about it. How much time do you spend on social media a day? According to social.com we spend almost two hours/day on it. The Mothers Institute also reports working mums use it the most [92%]. Not surprising when the average person in the UK is signed up to seven social media accounts; not to mention the time needed to monitor your kids’ social media activity. Somehow, two hours seems like it could be much, much bigger. Even when seven out of ten of us say we should spend less time on social media - we don't because 56% of us have a FOMO [ fear of missing out] on social media activity.

What’s the worst that can happen if we take the odd say off social media?

I’m sitting here, pondering this question and I really can't think of anything that bad. Can you?

Having recently joined Facebook and Instagram this year [Yes, one of my first messages was welcome to the 21st Century messages], I quickly understand how it can take over your life - it’s addictive - Dopamine Fix Central. I love it for keeping in touch with friends and family - it does make you feel more connected.

The thing is, we all have other shit to take care of outside of social media and one of those important things is self-care.

What I love about social media is that we can all pick up from where we left off. Just like our favourite TV Soaps, it's not hard to pick up the thread and get quickly up to date.

So, what, if you join the social conversations late? No one expects you to be on standby to post, like, comment or share. The fact that you join in the conversation at all will always be appreciated. So, let's ask ourselves this question;

WHAT MEANS MORE TO ME? Getting some more free time back to myself or keeping my Social Media crown?

If you want more free time, give the detox a go.

Make Chores Childs' Play

For mums who are doing the lion's share of the household chores, tip three is get your kids doing the chores. You will start to win free time back for yourself.

Become the ‘Homemaker Coach’ rather than the Housekeeper.

Babies and toddlers love copying adults. My three-year-old niece Katherine is already helping her mum dust. Her little friend Luke plays with a toy vacuum cleaner.

Kids want to do adult things. I remember in my childhood standing on a foot stool so I could wash dishes. My Mum and Dad taught me everything I know about running a household. As a result, this part of my adulthood has been a breeze.

Household jobs can be playtime for kids and in turn make the chores child's play for parents. By delegating household chores, kids also learn valuable life-long skills and parents gain precious time back to themselves. Research also shows that children who do chores become more successful adults.

And if you are having trouble motivating your older kids to get involved, watch these two videos for inspiration. 1.Chores and Choices, 2.The Bonell Family

Home Alone Hang-Outs

Ever seen the film, Home Alone? Where 8 year old Kevin, wakes up to an empty house after wishing his family would disappear.

As a mum you might have similar fleeting thoughts or maybe you fantasize about running away. You’re not alone. According to research by Mums net, 67% of mum’s dream of being alone even on Mother’s Day.

So pre-arrange a regular time to hang out by yourself at home. Send your whole family out to do something whilst you do whatever you want to do. [Single mums ask a close friend to help with childcare].

It's not selfish to want or expect some time to yourself. HA-HOs give you the chance to relax, recharge and just be you - guilt free.

Swap Wishes for Way Finders

If you are still finding it hard to get free time, what's holding you back? Rachel Hersenberg PH. D suggests confusing free time with unstructured time could be the answer.

Unstructured time means we don’t have a plan in place for what we want to get done. Literally hours can go by before we realise it. Channel-hopping, social surfing, binge eating, obsessive thinking and compulsive behaviour are all examples of how we spend our unstructured time. Unstructured time is wasted time. It kind of makes us wish for more free time. So, here's how to get more structure. Shift your energy and stop those free time wishes.

Ask yourself, how much of my time is unstructured? Map it out over a standard week. What situations come up?

Bin these time wasters because they are not serving you. Take back your free time and plan in ways to spend it. This is how you find your way to more free time.

You now have five easy ways to get more ‘me time’.

So go and enjoy every minute of your newfound freedom.

Not sure what to do with your free time?

Sign up for a list of 70 great ideas on how to spend it.

© Kate Halewood, Rootball Coaching and Consultancy Ltd

10 Great Lifestyle Lifts for Working Mums

Being a mum and a woman in business can be a bit of a juggling act. Balancing your kid’s needs, work pressures and private life can be stressful. Some days you have so much to do, you think your head might explode.

Most women decide to stop doing things to maintain their sanity. Focusing on what they consider to be manageable in their busy lives.

It is possible for working mums to regain balance across all aspects of their life. By making small tweaks here and there, you can live a more fulfilled life.

Here are some tips to help you give your lifestyle a bit of a lift.

1. Health & Fitness Routines

The NHS recommend you should do 150 minutes of moderate aerobic activity every week. This is equal to a daily twenty-minute brisk walk. They also prescribe strength exercises that work all the major muscles on two or more days a week.

There are many ways you can incorporate fitness into your working day. The most important thing is to make sure your routine fits in well with your busy schedule. This way you will stick to it.

I particularly like my sister Caroline's approach to regular exercise.

Apart from making time to go to the gym and walking Pippin the family dog, she also exercises with her daughter, Katherine.

Even though Katherine is only three years old, she is an expert in doing early morning and evening squats. They even do some low-level acrobat gymnastics together. Both benefit by keeping fit and spending more time together. It also teaches Katherine the importance of a having a fitness routine at an early age.

2. Make Changes at Work

Busy mums often build strong social relationships and networks at work. Grabbing regular coffees with workmates and putting the world to rights. Being part of a tea club that keeps the drinks and the conversation flowing. Sharing a box of ‘naughty but nice’ chocolates as it makes the rounds. These activities strengthen friendships at work. They also result in a high intake of caffeine.

Caffeine is a stimulant. High doses can increase anxiety levels and make us feel more tired. This was something I experienced a few years back whilst being part of a tea club at work. Some days I would drink more than 6 mugs during my shift. I started having palpitations that cause me even more anxiety. The only way to prevent it was to cut out the caffeine.

This does not mean you have to stop being social. Instead, opt for de-caffeinated hot drinks or herbal teas. Add sliced fruit to water to give it a more interesting flavour. Start a healthy snack club with your workmates. The key thing is to reduce your caffeine intake to remove chemical induced anxiety.

3. Increasing Financial Income

According to the Child Poverty Action Group, the cost of a child is £150,753 per couple or £183,335 for a lone parent. Mums and Dads often feel the pressure to work longer hours or seek promotion to absorb the extra costs.

If you want to increase your annual income, consider finding passive income streams. Passive income is when you continue to get paid after the work is complete. You can Google 'passive income streams' and there are plenty of ideas on how you can go about it.

Possibilities include royalties from books, movies, or songs you may have written. Revenue from individual or joint investments. Ones where you don't have to be present to earn it e.g. real estate or high dividend stocks. Commissions from affiliated blogs or income from e-courses or e-guides you have developed. By putting in the work upfront you can enjoy earning extra income whilst you spend time with your kids.

4. Thoughts on Wealth and Personal Possessions

If you are obsessing about how much or little you give to your kids in comparison to other parents - STOP - do an Elsa* and let it go! There is always going to be a parent who can provide their children with more gifts than you. Often the parents you know who give their kids everything, can still find their children wanting more.

Gifting kids with the latest smartphone and designer clothes can make you popular. It can also break the bank of Mum and Dad and it will not provide the things that matter most to your child.

I like the article written by Erin Kurt on Lifehack. Her research shows it’s the small things that mothers do that mean the most to their kids. Giving hugs and having great conversations. Leaving special messages in lunch boxes and in desks. Watching films together and telling stories about when they were little. My husband grew up in a family where there was very little wealth and possessions. Yet he can share some of the happiest childhood stories, much more so than anyone I know.

Instead of placing value on possessions and wealth, look to other aspects of your life. Areas that bring you and your family joy and fulfilment. This is where you will find true wealth and you own it already.

*Queen Elsa sang Let It Go in the movie Frozen.

5. Find Gratitude in Spirituality

Working mums can often feel frazzled and spend a lot of time thinking in the future. This stems from a desire to well manage and control work and family commitments. Spending too much time in the future can cause anxiety. As mums try their best to predict and control future events, they can start to worry. They become overwhelmed by competing demands on their time and can become anxious.

Whatever your religion, spirituality is something that touches us all. It's a search for meaning in life, connecting to something bigger than ourselves. Being able to find gratitude for experiences in your life can bring you back to the present. It can encourage positive thoughts and guide you back to what you value - to what is most important to you.

One way to generate positive thoughts is to start a 'Gratitude Journal'. This involves getting in touch with what makes us happy. If we focus on what we are grateful for, more of those things will manifest in our lives.

Take some time to reflect on the events of the day. Remember the things that made you smile, laugh and filled your hearts with happiness. Record it in your journal so you can celebrate the moments for which you are most grateful. Going to bed on good news can also help you sleep better. In the morning you will be better equipped to balance kids, work and whatever else you have planned.

Oprah Winfrey has a Gratitude Journal and writes in it every night before she goes to sleep. Her television show has the highest rating for a program of its kind in history. She is one of the great spiritual teachers of our time.

6. Personal Development

Being a working mum can often result in their own personal development plans being shelved. Apart from the ongoing lessons of motherhood, many feel unable to take on extra training.

Learning is an important part of personal growth. Personal growth makes for a more fulfiling life. The more flexible and adaptable we are, the easier we navigate through life. We have all heard the saying 'a healthy mind is a healthy body'. There are 100 billion or so neurons or nerve cells in your brain that each grow ‘dendrites’. The more connections dendrites have with another neuron, the stronger the brain grows. The mind starts to expand. Regular learning sharpens our brains. It improves our ability to make decisions and makes us more equipped to overcome the challenges that life can throw at us.

Try a new activity every week to develop a growth mindset. In a year you could learn up to 52 new things. This is great for mums' because kids are always learning. Get involved in their creative activities and find some of your own to do when you have tucked them up in bed. My brother in law, Dan recently made some clay animals with his daughter, Katherine. During the activity he took still images at different stages of development. He then taught himself to make a short animation.

Parents getting creative with their kids

7. More Free Time

By free time, I am not talking about more time with other people. It’s about time for yourself- 'me time'.

Tasha Rube, a Licensed Master Social Worker has written an article on the subject. I particularly love the section about finding a suitable space to be alone. It recommends establishing a sacred place. Scheduling time to be in it and asking those around you to respect your privacy for a set time period.

This is a particularly great idea if you find it difficult to leave the house. Scheduling alone time can stop you from losing yourself. It gives you an opportunity to re-charge your batteries so you can be more present for the people in your home and work life.

Relationships

Splitting your time between your partner, family and friends can sometimes cause you a big headache. Whilst it is impossible to please everyone, all the time, it is possible to maintain positive relationships across the three relationship groups.

8. Friendships

Platonic friendships are often the first kind of relationships we develop through choice. They play an important role in our emotional development and well-being. Where platonic love exists, friends lean on each other for emotional support. A good friend will give it to you straight and show you compassion at the same time. They will always try and help you in your time of need. They can also provide us with different perspectives, helping us make better decisions.

Platonic friendships can sometimes get side-lined in favour of family. Pals can get put on the metaphorical subs bench. Brought only into play when other closer relationships fall short of our expectations.

It is a myth that absence makes the heart grow fonder. Where platonic love exists, repeated and sustained separation can bring on anxiety. Fears of insecurity and abandonment can turn into resentment.

Make time for good friends and put a date on it. Even if its having them over for dinner with the kids. By scheduling regular dates to meet up you are showing your pals how important they are to you - regardless of how busy your life gets.

9. Family Relationships

Often working mums' feel they must be available around the clock for both home and work. The tension between professional commitment and time at home is an ongoing dilemma. Having less time at home with kids can make mothers feel guilty. Particularly if they are not around as much outside of school hours. Knowing you can’t always be there is a fact of being a mother in business.

Make a household agreement to have a family dinner at least once a week. At the dinner discuss and plan a family activity that everyone wants to do for the following week. Schedule it on a family calendar and put it up in the kitchen as a reminder so everyone can look forward to it. Make it happen and immerse yourself in the joy that is your family.

10. Intimate Relationships

You’ve not had much sleep, the kids are screaming, the dogs barking. You look at your partner and you can’t remember the last time you had some alone time together. Between work and making sure the kids are ok, little time is leftover to focus on the two of you. Planning in date nights and extra-curricular activities can be a good idea. Although sometimes they can feel a bit unnatural and lack spontaneity.

Instead, try to incorporate romantic gestures and intimacy into the everyday things you do for each other. For example, having a candle lit supper after the kids have gone to bed. Blow them away by completing one of the family chores they normally do. Cuddles on the couch and impromptu passing kisses can also work until the chance arises to become more intimate. You will be amazed how little acts of romance, intimacy and kindness can strengthen the bond between you and your partner.

Introduce theses 10 great tips over time. Weave them into your weekly schedule and lift your lifestyle to new heights.

Get in touch

Contact me at kate@rootball.co.uk or call me on 07759 652357 to keep me posted on your progress.

Click here if you would like to find out more about my Lifeworks or Lifestyle Lifting Growth Plans.

Article sources

https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/exercise/ http://www.cpag.org.uk/sites/default/files/uploads/CostofaChild2018_web.pdf https://www.lifehack.org/articles/featured/the-top-10-things-children-really-want-their-parents-to-do-with-them.html https://www.wikihow.com/Get-Alone-Time

© Kate Halewood, Rootball Coaching & Consultancy Ltd